That doesn't seem like it would be the hardest question to answer right? After all we are Christians, we go to his house every time the doors are open (many times its us who opens the doors), we read the Bible more than the average Joe end can tell you any story in the book. We know exactly what's going to happen at the end of the world since we've read every Left Behind book from rapture to Armageddon, and we can tell you every cheesy line of faith expression we have ever heard because they are printed on a large majority of our T-shirts. That being said who is God? Morgan Freeman? Is He some cosmic, bearded mastermind who sits in heaven surrounded by chubby, naked angels who look like Gerber babies throwing lightning bolts at his "children"? I am fairly certain that anyone raised in church could respond to this question with a well rehearsed answer that no one really understands but has been spoken in churches everywhere such as "The Father of the Universe," or "The Creator of heaven and Earth." It literally astounds me that so many of us claim to follow a God whom we never take the time to meet. Of course I don't think we can ever fully figure God out, seeing as how a God who can be comprehended is no God at all, but I believe it well worth the effort.
Perhaps you have been wondering who God is. You may have chosen to embark on this lifelong quest for the pursuit of the life-fulfilling God you have heard about. You possibly could have known that you are called, by an unknown someone, to a greatness beyond that of anything you have ever seen or heard from the world around you, you would of course be right. Upon reading this, one in this situation would most likely wish that I would just make absolute haste in getting to the point, here being the answer to the above stated question. Don't bother, you won't be satisfied and more likely than not you will reach the conclusion with more thought provoking questions than thought fulfilling answers. Here my purpose is to let you know what it is you need to learn.
The reason for this is simple, being that my perfect explanation for this God I claim to follow would fail miserably in the achievement of your full comprehension of God. I could compose an endless piece of literature that accurately presents to you the God I have personally come to know and yet fall very short of a complete definition of who God is. I can only proclaim the God I have so gradually been introduced to that currently resides in me. I am sure the God in you is quite different. Do not think that I am speaking as one who claims there is no singular God, but only the spirit of people manifesting itself how ever it pleases or some other crap like that. Those who say there is no absolute truth are merely denying the existence of truth, thus enabling the belief in whatever one fancies considering nothing is true anyway. God is, always has been, and will always be God despite whatever I choose to believe him as. My personal preference of who I believe God is does not in any way affect who God actually is. I only mean that different people know different aspects of God according to how he has revealed himself, which of course is our only reliable source of His identity. Search, Find. God is only a complete mystery to those who dont want to know Him.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Life on Empty
I spent the week running on empty. I had to much to do and the innability of my body to keep up. It is times like those that I wonder why it is that I am filling my plate so much and then I realize that everything I do is because God told me to. I was praying that God would empty my plate but then I realized I want God to give me a bigger apetite with a faster metabolism. I want to pig out on the buffet of life.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
The Next Hippies
The 1960's saw more drugs, sex and overall abandoning of God than any generation this country has ever seen. The emotional scars are just as evident today as they were 50 years ago, and they manifest themselves in the children of those hurt. However there is a seemly overlooked aspect of Hippie culture which we never realized. The days of the hippies were days of pure united rebellion, led solely by teenagers. Some people disagreed with US aid in Vietnam so an international brotherhood of teenagers decided to band together and revolt. Revolt against what they thought was wrong, against what society had told them was right, against everything they had ever known. No one told them to, in fact the world discouraged it, they just did it. Instead of letting the issues of the world overtake them they took action, effective action, relentless, unconquerable action. And on top of that, they didn't serve the powerful God which we serve.
I find it incredibly sad that the only example I can think of teenagers, may I say it again for emphasis but teenagers, who simply decided to change the world and take all means necessary to do so are hippies. Ironically hippies tended to stand for everything the church stood against, and yet we as a church find ourselves failing drastically in global reformation in comparison.
I often get the sense that we as youth feel that the "Church" is the group of adults that have no problem answering God's call and living effectively, as that must get easier with age. We know God has big plans for our lives so we eagerly await adulthood when we can fully understand what God has for us and thus put it into action. We have everything backwards. Paul told the young aspiring Timmy in 1 Timothy 4: 12 that we are to "set an example for the believers...." What!? God made us to be the inspiration, the influence, the motivation and so much more to the people who have been "in the faith" for longer than we have been in existence. Good ol Solomon says in Ecclesiastes 4 "I saw that everyone who lived and walked under the sun followed the youth."
At first this seams entirely preposterous yet it does not take a very long journey through history to see this is absolutely true. Think of any musician who could be named among the "greats," when this artist or band was at the peak of stardom how old was the audience which they played in front of? Of the horrendous clothing choices that have been made fashionable in this century alone how many of which rose to popularity in the high schools far before they hit the workplace?
We as teenagers have subconsciously been ruling the world since the term adolescence was coined.
Where are we leading our society?
It is solely our responsibility to change what we see. Do not think that it can not be done because it has been done before. It's time for the next hippie generation. A generation in undaunted pursuit of what God has entitled this word. Love. Not the love of the hippies whose boundary between that and lust was obscure or non-existent. The love I am speaking of is the kind only able to express itself through death. Death on a cross, death to ourselves and death to the chains which bind us. Life CANNOT live where death has not been. Our revolt will fail if we are after global denomination into churchdom, but has to be for eternal life, eternal life that starts not in heaven but right here, right now.
One also may take note that the hippies were absolutely out of their mind. Nothing they did made sense, long hair with tye-dye shirts and moccasins? I think we have spent too much time in our right mind and not His right mind.
I find it incredibly sad that the only example I can think of teenagers, may I say it again for emphasis but teenagers, who simply decided to change the world and take all means necessary to do so are hippies. Ironically hippies tended to stand for everything the church stood against, and yet we as a church find ourselves failing drastically in global reformation in comparison.
I often get the sense that we as youth feel that the "Church" is the group of adults that have no problem answering God's call and living effectively, as that must get easier with age. We know God has big plans for our lives so we eagerly await adulthood when we can fully understand what God has for us and thus put it into action. We have everything backwards. Paul told the young aspiring Timmy in 1 Timothy 4: 12 that we are to "set an example for the believers...." What!? God made us to be the inspiration, the influence, the motivation and so much more to the people who have been "in the faith" for longer than we have been in existence. Good ol Solomon says in Ecclesiastes 4 "I saw that everyone who lived and walked under the sun followed the youth."
At first this seams entirely preposterous yet it does not take a very long journey through history to see this is absolutely true. Think of any musician who could be named among the "greats," when this artist or band was at the peak of stardom how old was the audience which they played in front of? Of the horrendous clothing choices that have been made fashionable in this century alone how many of which rose to popularity in the high schools far before they hit the workplace?
We as teenagers have subconsciously been ruling the world since the term adolescence was coined.
Where are we leading our society?
It is solely our responsibility to change what we see. Do not think that it can not be done because it has been done before. It's time for the next hippie generation. A generation in undaunted pursuit of what God has entitled this word. Love. Not the love of the hippies whose boundary between that and lust was obscure or non-existent. The love I am speaking of is the kind only able to express itself through death. Death on a cross, death to ourselves and death to the chains which bind us. Life CANNOT live where death has not been. Our revolt will fail if we are after global denomination into churchdom, but has to be for eternal life, eternal life that starts not in heaven but right here, right now.
One also may take note that the hippies were absolutely out of their mind. Nothing they did made sense, long hair with tye-dye shirts and moccasins? I think we have spent too much time in our right mind and not His right mind.
Monday, February 2, 2009
2/1/09
I was asked today to give the lesson in kids church, 5 minutes before I was supposed to deliver it. It was about sin and salvation. I pulled out everything I had and it still appeared to fall on deaf ears. So is the everlasting burden of children’s ministry I guess. I hope that a seed was planted but I may never know. It was very uncomfortable and not very fun at all-which most likely means its what I am supposed to work on. I will conquer this by the Grace of God I will not be defeated by prepubescent beings. I owe it to the next generation to give them the experience that kids church gave me. I want to be someone’s Pastor Hugh, someone’s Randy Jones. I want to be the one that inspired and spoke into their life before the world had time to. I surely would not be who I am had it not been for the Godly children’s workers I was surrounded with.
I was asked today to give the lesson in kids church, 5 minutes before I was supposed to deliver it. It was about sin and salvation. I pulled out everything I had and it still appeared to fall on deaf ears. So is the everlasting burden of children’s ministry I guess. I hope that a seed was planted but I may never know. It was very uncomfortable and not very fun at all-which most likely means its what I am supposed to work on. I will conquer this by the Grace of God I will not be defeated by prepubescent beings. I owe it to the next generation to give them the experience that kids church gave me. I want to be someone’s Pastor Hugh, someone’s Randy Jones. I want to be the one that inspired and spoke into their life before the world had time to. I surely would not be who I am had it not been for the Godly children’s workers I was surrounded with.
1/28/09
Everything I’ve ever accomplished has been achieved first by me simply deciding to accomplish it. The only thing I have ever really wanted to achieve was to be a direct impact on the lives of those around me. I want to see lives changed, turned around into disciples- not Christians- but disciples who actually have a productive relationship with God. I am therefore deciding to be an impact to the world.
We all like to quote “Preach the gospel at all times and if necessary, use words,” well it’s about to time to start using some words.
Everything I’ve ever accomplished has been achieved first by me simply deciding to accomplish it. The only thing I have ever really wanted to achieve was to be a direct impact on the lives of those around me. I want to see lives changed, turned around into disciples- not Christians- but disciples who actually have a productive relationship with God. I am therefore deciding to be an impact to the world.
We all like to quote “Preach the gospel at all times and if necessary, use words,” well it’s about to time to start using some words.
1/27/09
Last Wednesday, God told me to tell my friend Michael that He loved him and has as plan for him and not to give up. Both Thursday and Friday I dragged my heels as best I as I could when at the very last minute before being swept away into the mass of class changing I spitted out the words I was supposed to say. Of course, I masked them with comments like “I know this is weird but…” and did not have any heart behind what I was saying. Afterwards I felt nothing. I thought I should feel gratitude that God was able to use my obedience, or that I should feel remorse that I did not say it as well as I should have. Nothing. I realized that I had just been a part in a rare occurrence. God needed what He told me to say so much that despite He overrode my fear to say it anyway. He intended on using it as an opportunity to bless me, but since I was unwilling I don’t get the reward. This reminds me of Jonah when after finally coming to terms with his mission delivered the most pitiful sermon to date with hopes the his audience would ignore him yet an entire city repented because of what was said. God will not loose. He doesn’t NEED me, He WANTS me. He can do just fine without me but He wants to see me grow and to see me blessed by accomplishing something.
Last Wednesday, God told me to tell my friend Michael that He loved him and has as plan for him and not to give up. Both Thursday and Friday I dragged my heels as best I as I could when at the very last minute before being swept away into the mass of class changing I spitted out the words I was supposed to say. Of course, I masked them with comments like “I know this is weird but…” and did not have any heart behind what I was saying. Afterwards I felt nothing. I thought I should feel gratitude that God was able to use my obedience, or that I should feel remorse that I did not say it as well as I should have. Nothing. I realized that I had just been a part in a rare occurrence. God needed what He told me to say so much that despite He overrode my fear to say it anyway. He intended on using it as an opportunity to bless me, but since I was unwilling I don’t get the reward. This reminds me of Jonah when after finally coming to terms with his mission delivered the most pitiful sermon to date with hopes the his audience would ignore him yet an entire city repented because of what was said. God will not loose. He doesn’t NEED me, He WANTS me. He can do just fine without me but He wants to see me grow and to see me blessed by accomplishing something.
1/15/09
I am here again. I'm at that place I have grown so miserably accustomed to that is the low after the high. I refuse to stay. I have lived my life in a circle, never going anywhere. Maybe it is better to say that I am in a tightly wound coil, it feels like I'm going in circles but after looking back on the years it appears as though I've gone somewhere. I am going to find God. I will not be overcome and defeated so that in a month or two I can have a personal revival and start all back over. I am rewriting what I've always known of living life. I am choosing to move steadily upward instead of looping around again.
I realize that I loose the zest not because it fades away, but because it is taken away so I I'll look for the bigger blessing in store.
I am here again. I'm at that place I have grown so miserably accustomed to that is the low after the high. I refuse to stay. I have lived my life in a circle, never going anywhere. Maybe it is better to say that I am in a tightly wound coil, it feels like I'm going in circles but after looking back on the years it appears as though I've gone somewhere. I am going to find God. I will not be overcome and defeated so that in a month or two I can have a personal revival and start all back over. I am rewriting what I've always known of living life. I am choosing to move steadily upward instead of looping around again.
I realize that I loose the zest not because it fades away, but because it is taken away so I I'll look for the bigger blessing in store.
1/13/08
What is greatness? What is it that makes a man Great? When the poets of old penned the words that brought their fame, did they know they would be revered, quoted, misquoted and misunderstood for centuries to come? Or were they merely writing down what their heart was screaming to them? Where the speakers of the quotes that stir our soul and shake us to the core every time we hear them intentionally attempting to utter timeless words, or was it just what seemed most logical to say at the time? Do great people know they are great? The dreamers, visionaries, those who accomplished what the world could not live without, are they the great ones? What if greatness was measured by how well a man knew himself? Surely this is a feat few have ever really achieved. How can we know if have fully achieved this?
I have so many questions, most came from answers to other questions. The more I know, the more I know how much I don't know. I have very little experience in this field but I would imagine that the questions which are asked by those who do not know who they are far more agonizing. My questions, after the frustration of confusion dissipates, bring the promise of joy. I have found the Truth, and it has set me free.
What is greatness? What is it that makes a man Great? When the poets of old penned the words that brought their fame, did they know they would be revered, quoted, misquoted and misunderstood for centuries to come? Or were they merely writing down what their heart was screaming to them? Where the speakers of the quotes that stir our soul and shake us to the core every time we hear them intentionally attempting to utter timeless words, or was it just what seemed most logical to say at the time? Do great people know they are great? The dreamers, visionaries, those who accomplished what the world could not live without, are they the great ones? What if greatness was measured by how well a man knew himself? Surely this is a feat few have ever really achieved. How can we know if have fully achieved this?
I have so many questions, most came from answers to other questions. The more I know, the more I know how much I don't know. I have very little experience in this field but I would imagine that the questions which are asked by those who do not know who they are far more agonizing. My questions, after the frustration of confusion dissipates, bring the promise of joy. I have found the Truth, and it has set me free.
12/17/08
Words can do no justice to my current state of mind. The closest word I am aware of is Excited, perpetually excited. God has filled me with such exploding passion, an unquenchable thirst that is miraculously more pleasant than anything I have drank from the cup of life. God s showing me a reality which only existed in visions, and He is far from finished. The direction of my life is headed to a greater height than I still can imagine and am wondering how it is possible to go much further, not that I am weary of the journey, but that I cannot comprehend how God could either fill my life with greater joy than my earthly body can handle or that He could even keep this pace up in me for any period of time. I can not go back, I have tasted and found that it is good. I am very curious as to how I could remain on Earth with the amount of excitement now in me, at increasing speeds. It draws me to the conclusion that my time here is almost through, for Life cannot be measured in how long it took to be finished, but by how much it actually occurred.
Words can do no justice to my current state of mind. The closest word I am aware of is Excited, perpetually excited. God has filled me with such exploding passion, an unquenchable thirst that is miraculously more pleasant than anything I have drank from the cup of life. God s showing me a reality which only existed in visions, and He is far from finished. The direction of my life is headed to a greater height than I still can imagine and am wondering how it is possible to go much further, not that I am weary of the journey, but that I cannot comprehend how God could either fill my life with greater joy than my earthly body can handle or that He could even keep this pace up in me for any period of time. I can not go back, I have tasted and found that it is good. I am very curious as to how I could remain on Earth with the amount of excitement now in me, at increasing speeds. It draws me to the conclusion that my time here is almost through, for Life cannot be measured in how long it took to be finished, but by how much it actually occurred.
12/1/08
It is entirely not my fault that I was created. It is certainly not my own doing I possess "wisdom beyond my years" or that it comes naturally to spiritually council those twice, three times my age. Whatsoever the purpose of my Creator is to blame. This burden has been placed on me to be shared. It is not at all fair that truths of heaven are so easily grasped by me yet take a lifetime for my neighbor. Therefore, I not having earned these things myself must bestow them on another.
I live, first because I have no reasonable alternative. It seems to be the pursuit of man instilled in us by God to pursue happiness. This pursuit then becomes our motive for movement. The chase is given to us to reach ultimate happiness in the Father. That is all He can do with the allowance of freewill, simply giving us an unquenchable thirst for completion and the choice to obtain it.
If we are honest, we love God because we love ourselves. If we didn't have the fear of not being happy, would we care at all about what was going on in the universe? I love God because.... A surprisingly hard statement to finish. Is it really because He died for me? I've never loved a human for that reason. Is it because He offers me a get out of Hell free pass? That's kind of Him, but should I waste my life on Earth thanking the one who ensures I'm good when this life is over? I love God because He is the only path that ends in me being happy. When the sky is falling to the ground and people are being sent to the lake of fire at the end of the world, I will still end up happy. I love God because He gave me a fight inside of me that despite any action of mine cannot be quenched, and then He gave me a cause to fight for. I am on this daily pursuit of God because only He knows me. Only He knows what’s inside of me. I am searching for me so I can know where in His plan I fit. I am hunting this plan because I know that I will only be able to silence the Voice screaming in my head by listening to it. I wish to silence this Voice so I can be happy.
I have found in my quest that whenever I am assigned a task, what God wants from it is not it's completion, but the things completed in the journey. For instance, last January I felt strongly that I was to start a prayer group for the Uth Force in which we as students would join weekly in combat against the forces keeping us from being where we needed to be. I vowed that if no one else came, I would still get on my face before God, alone. It was only after months of me praying for an hour or more alone every week that I realized that the group I had in mind was not what God planned at all. I do not believe I heard Him wrong though, I simply believe that God knew that the only way I would volunteer to set apart that time for Him would be the promise of other contenders in the battle. I have been going to the church every Tuesday night for almost a year and have yet to be joined by another member of the Uth Force, and that is ok with me. I had no idea how much I needed that alone time with God, or how much He needed that alone time with me. I say all that to show that my goals, which align to the best of my knowledge and ability to the will of God, are only hypothetical destinations of which a journey through other places is required. I pursue the life that God wants for me on Earth because that is the only map I have to getting where He wants me in heaven
It is entirely not my fault that I was created. It is certainly not my own doing I possess "wisdom beyond my years" or that it comes naturally to spiritually council those twice, three times my age. Whatsoever the purpose of my Creator is to blame. This burden has been placed on me to be shared. It is not at all fair that truths of heaven are so easily grasped by me yet take a lifetime for my neighbor. Therefore, I not having earned these things myself must bestow them on another.
I live, first because I have no reasonable alternative. It seems to be the pursuit of man instilled in us by God to pursue happiness. This pursuit then becomes our motive for movement. The chase is given to us to reach ultimate happiness in the Father. That is all He can do with the allowance of freewill, simply giving us an unquenchable thirst for completion and the choice to obtain it.
If we are honest, we love God because we love ourselves. If we didn't have the fear of not being happy, would we care at all about what was going on in the universe? I love God because.... A surprisingly hard statement to finish. Is it really because He died for me? I've never loved a human for that reason. Is it because He offers me a get out of Hell free pass? That's kind of Him, but should I waste my life on Earth thanking the one who ensures I'm good when this life is over? I love God because He is the only path that ends in me being happy. When the sky is falling to the ground and people are being sent to the lake of fire at the end of the world, I will still end up happy. I love God because He gave me a fight inside of me that despite any action of mine cannot be quenched, and then He gave me a cause to fight for. I am on this daily pursuit of God because only He knows me. Only He knows what’s inside of me. I am searching for me so I can know where in His plan I fit. I am hunting this plan because I know that I will only be able to silence the Voice screaming in my head by listening to it. I wish to silence this Voice so I can be happy.
I have found in my quest that whenever I am assigned a task, what God wants from it is not it's completion, but the things completed in the journey. For instance, last January I felt strongly that I was to start a prayer group for the Uth Force in which we as students would join weekly in combat against the forces keeping us from being where we needed to be. I vowed that if no one else came, I would still get on my face before God, alone. It was only after months of me praying for an hour or more alone every week that I realized that the group I had in mind was not what God planned at all. I do not believe I heard Him wrong though, I simply believe that God knew that the only way I would volunteer to set apart that time for Him would be the promise of other contenders in the battle. I have been going to the church every Tuesday night for almost a year and have yet to be joined by another member of the Uth Force, and that is ok with me. I had no idea how much I needed that alone time with God, or how much He needed that alone time with me. I say all that to show that my goals, which align to the best of my knowledge and ability to the will of God, are only hypothetical destinations of which a journey through other places is required. I pursue the life that God wants for me on Earth because that is the only map I have to getting where He wants me in heaven
11/30/08
I am deciding to explode tomorrow. The fuse was set in place when I first prayed that infamous prayer of salvation at age 4. It was lit when I was baptized in the power of the Holy Spirit for the first time at age 9, abandoning my hopes of becoming a professional basketball player for full time ministry. It only makes sense that an explosion is eminent. Tomorrow will be exceptional. Many have stated the benefits of living like there is no tomorrow today, which in a sense is what I will be doing. However, I am LIVING because there is a tomorrow. A tomorrow better than today and that is something to be ecstatic about. Boom.
I am deciding to explode tomorrow. The fuse was set in place when I first prayed that infamous prayer of salvation at age 4. It was lit when I was baptized in the power of the Holy Spirit for the first time at age 9, abandoning my hopes of becoming a professional basketball player for full time ministry. It only makes sense that an explosion is eminent. Tomorrow will be exceptional. Many have stated the benefits of living like there is no tomorrow today, which in a sense is what I will be doing. However, I am LIVING because there is a tomorrow. A tomorrow better than today and that is something to be ecstatic about. Boom.
11/25/08
I believe it is quite clear I have been doing some intense thinking. There are times when I feel very proud of myself for figuring out some unknown truth perhaps no one else has thought of. These time are brief as, ironically, the introduction to most questions becomes the conclusion to mine. WHY. Why are we fighting against evil? Why are we pursuing happiness? Why go after lost souls? Why are the inhabitants of Earth inhabiting the Earth? I sincerely hope I am not the only one knows there must be more to this universe than a game of checkers between God and Satan where at the end of time the side with the most pieces wins. But why? This universe is getting bigger the more I try and comprehend it, I'm getting lost.
Oh and along with a tent, I'm also supposed to start a video web site thing. News to me.
I believe it is quite clear I have been doing some intense thinking. There are times when I feel very proud of myself for figuring out some unknown truth perhaps no one else has thought of. These time are brief as, ironically, the introduction to most questions becomes the conclusion to mine. WHY. Why are we fighting against evil? Why are we pursuing happiness? Why go after lost souls? Why are the inhabitants of Earth inhabiting the Earth? I sincerely hope I am not the only one knows there must be more to this universe than a game of checkers between God and Satan where at the end of time the side with the most pieces wins. But why? This universe is getting bigger the more I try and comprehend it, I'm getting lost.
Oh and along with a tent, I'm also supposed to start a video web site thing. News to me.
11/18/08
From the beginning of time human thinkers have placed the entire universe in categories of opposites. Light and Dark, Good and Bad, Sound and Silence. I think we have been wrong. Instead of opposites, we merely have Things and their Absence. What is a bad person than someone who lacks the morals and character of a good person? What is darkness other than the depravation of Light? What this all means is that the things that are simply the absence of another thing are not a force. Dark can never overcome Light, only attempt to get rid of it. Therefore the things actually present are eternal. The balance of the two is what forms reality.
From the beginning of time human thinkers have placed the entire universe in categories of opposites. Light and Dark, Good and Bad, Sound and Silence. I think we have been wrong. Instead of opposites, we merely have Things and their Absence. What is a bad person than someone who lacks the morals and character of a good person? What is darkness other than the depravation of Light? What this all means is that the things that are simply the absence of another thing are not a force. Dark can never overcome Light, only attempt to get rid of it. Therefore the things actually present are eternal. The balance of the two is what forms reality.
11/12/08
No word on the tent, but God is definitely moving in ways I have never seen.
Early last week Barack Obama was elected President of the United States of America, against the will of every republican conservative evangelical such as myself. The media is rightly shouting from the rooftops how extraordinary it is of us to have evolved so far as to elect a black president, of which I agree is a great accomplishment. What the media is omitting though is what is increasingly intriguing me. The fact that the largest amount of young people in the history of the electoral college turned out on election day to cast their vote for Change inspires me to no end. A generation eager for change? Is that not what I have been screaming for? Maybe I'm not fighting a losing battle after all. Granted, the change I am referring to is doubtless very different than the change so screamed by our presidential Elect, but I have now seen it possible in this day and age to build an army of passionate youth, which of course is my intention. I told a very liberal democrat that Obama would have to overturn Roe vs. Wade to gain my full support (a feat I'm not sure the most conservative republican could achieve without Divine help), but I would like to thank him for gathering the troops.
One of the most constant features on any one of the millions of DVD's is the ability to view deleted scenes that didn't make it in the movie. I really don't like watching them because for the most part, they were deleted for a good reason, like being a bad piece of entertainment which is not enjoyable to view. Sometimes, though, these scenes by my opinion would have greatly increased the quality of the viewing experience, which leaves me disappointed knowing the movie could have been that much greater. In heaven, as I'm watching the DVD of my life (on a 10,000 inch flat screen with digital surround sound while seated in the world's greatest Lazy-Boy mind you) I wonder if my feelings toward the deleted scenes, what could have happened, will leave me agreeing with the Director for the way He edited my life or will I be disappointed that I didn't include the scenes which would have won me the Oscar?
I have the horrible feeling that I will learn the mysteries of the universe before I find out why God wants me to get a tent. Maybe I already know, the solution just doesn't fit in my brain.
No word on the tent, but God is definitely moving in ways I have never seen.
Early last week Barack Obama was elected President of the United States of America, against the will of every republican conservative evangelical such as myself. The media is rightly shouting from the rooftops how extraordinary it is of us to have evolved so far as to elect a black president, of which I agree is a great accomplishment. What the media is omitting though is what is increasingly intriguing me. The fact that the largest amount of young people in the history of the electoral college turned out on election day to cast their vote for Change inspires me to no end. A generation eager for change? Is that not what I have been screaming for? Maybe I'm not fighting a losing battle after all. Granted, the change I am referring to is doubtless very different than the change so screamed by our presidential Elect, but I have now seen it possible in this day and age to build an army of passionate youth, which of course is my intention. I told a very liberal democrat that Obama would have to overturn Roe vs. Wade to gain my full support (a feat I'm not sure the most conservative republican could achieve without Divine help), but I would like to thank him for gathering the troops.
One of the most constant features on any one of the millions of DVD's is the ability to view deleted scenes that didn't make it in the movie. I really don't like watching them because for the most part, they were deleted for a good reason, like being a bad piece of entertainment which is not enjoyable to view. Sometimes, though, these scenes by my opinion would have greatly increased the quality of the viewing experience, which leaves me disappointed knowing the movie could have been that much greater. In heaven, as I'm watching the DVD of my life (on a 10,000 inch flat screen with digital surround sound while seated in the world's greatest Lazy-Boy mind you) I wonder if my feelings toward the deleted scenes, what could have happened, will leave me agreeing with the Director for the way He edited my life or will I be disappointed that I didn't include the scenes which would have won me the Oscar?
I have the horrible feeling that I will learn the mysteries of the universe before I find out why God wants me to get a tent. Maybe I already know, the solution just doesn't fit in my brain.
10/19/08
It is obvious that God is deliberately trying to rid me of the bonds of common sense and logic and thus freeing me to run wild in the realms of mental insanity. Who in their right mind would pursue a large temporary fortification for an unknown reason to be erected in an unknown location filled with any given amount of people. Nobody. And thus it is perfectly logical that I am not in my right mind. It really is liberating not being bound by logic. God I am here, I don't know where I will be tomorrow but I know that you will be there when I get there.
If I suddenly go off the deep end, at my funeral they will either say I, by God's grace alone, accomplished more than anyone ever imagined and are truly thankful, or they will say he died trying. I don't care either way as long as they are moved upward. And now I prepare for my dive.
It is obvious that God is deliberately trying to rid me of the bonds of common sense and logic and thus freeing me to run wild in the realms of mental insanity. Who in their right mind would pursue a large temporary fortification for an unknown reason to be erected in an unknown location filled with any given amount of people. Nobody. And thus it is perfectly logical that I am not in my right mind. It really is liberating not being bound by logic. God I am here, I don't know where I will be tomorrow but I know that you will be there when I get there.
If I suddenly go off the deep end, at my funeral they will either say I, by God's grace alone, accomplished more than anyone ever imagined and are truly thankful, or they will say he died trying. I don't care either way as long as they are moved upward. And now I prepare for my dive.
10/14/08
So this tent affair, despite my fervent desire that it be metaphorical of the direction by which God is taking me, it most certainly is literal. Therefore it is only logical to assume I am losing it! God is asking me to get a tent. I have no idea where this tent is coming from, how big it is supposed to be, where and when I am to erect it or for what purpose and yet I find myself praying for its appearance. Not out of spite, to show God how little He knows of His plan for me, but I am actually pursuing a tent! I am surprised at how far God has led me, as I am not putting up any argument against this irrational behavior.
If I am hearing wrong, it is only so that I will be able to hear correctly when it counts. If I fail, it will be so that next time will be a success. If I am completely humiliated in this process, it will only put me among the ranks of Noah and Abraham. And thus, I need a tent.
So this tent affair, despite my fervent desire that it be metaphorical of the direction by which God is taking me, it most certainly is literal. Therefore it is only logical to assume I am losing it! God is asking me to get a tent. I have no idea where this tent is coming from, how big it is supposed to be, where and when I am to erect it or for what purpose and yet I find myself praying for its appearance. Not out of spite, to show God how little He knows of His plan for me, but I am actually pursuing a tent! I am surprised at how far God has led me, as I am not putting up any argument against this irrational behavior.
If I am hearing wrong, it is only so that I will be able to hear correctly when it counts. If I fail, it will be so that next time will be a success. If I am completely humiliated in this process, it will only put me among the ranks of Noah and Abraham. And thus, I need a tent.
10/11/08
A long time ago God gave me a vision of me preaching to this outdoor stadium filled with people. I just assumed that it was to show me that my purpose was public, that I would be speaking to large audiences. Today I happened to be glancing through a photo biography of the great Billy Graham, of which I was surprised to find a picture of him preaching to a group of 8,000 students, in my stadium! I know I have never seen this stadium before (as it is that of the University of California) but my vision most definitely matched the picture. At first I was very confused, not at my discovery, but at my reaction to it. I simply added it to my growing archive of confirmations given to me by God for what He has for me. Why should I be surprised to find God is serious? Now as to the purpose of this finding I am still unaware, but I think I feel God telling me to get a tent. A big tent. As in one by which revivals were started in the days of old, the early days of Billy Graham. I also heard something about receiving the baton handed to me and running with it.
I have never been much for journaling and yet I find myself doing just that. Like a scientist logging every thing that happens with his experiment, so am I writing down everything that is happening to me, as something is happening to me and it is bigger than I could imagine. I'm in over my head, and this is my account of my journey to insanity in Christ.
A long time ago God gave me a vision of me preaching to this outdoor stadium filled with people. I just assumed that it was to show me that my purpose was public, that I would be speaking to large audiences. Today I happened to be glancing through a photo biography of the great Billy Graham, of which I was surprised to find a picture of him preaching to a group of 8,000 students, in my stadium! I know I have never seen this stadium before (as it is that of the University of California) but my vision most definitely matched the picture. At first I was very confused, not at my discovery, but at my reaction to it. I simply added it to my growing archive of confirmations given to me by God for what He has for me. Why should I be surprised to find God is serious? Now as to the purpose of this finding I am still unaware, but I think I feel God telling me to get a tent. A big tent. As in one by which revivals were started in the days of old, the early days of Billy Graham. I also heard something about receiving the baton handed to me and running with it.
I have never been much for journaling and yet I find myself doing just that. Like a scientist logging every thing that happens with his experiment, so am I writing down everything that is happening to me, as something is happening to me and it is bigger than I could imagine. I'm in over my head, and this is my account of my journey to insanity in Christ.
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