Shout Out to the Ladies

Dear Women,

            I am not pretending that I have in the least bit “figured you out” but I have noticed some very troubling things that my fellow Men have caused. It is pretty common knowledge that a basic need of females is to feel beautiful but I think that you have unconsciously let Men define what beauty looks like. This is very bad because we seem to have messed everything up.

            Everywhere I go I see girls struggling so hard to fit into what we have defined has Beautiful and failing so miserably that what is left is hardly recognizable as a person, much less a treasured child of the living God. Needless to say I am tired of testosterone ruining lives when we were given the Divine responsibility of cherishing and leading God’s own Creation. I am not disowning my gender, just trying to redeem it.

            In an attempt to redeem the reputation of Men I want to redefine what it means to be Beautiful. It is a little awkward for me and very different more blunt than anything I have ever written but there are too many slaves to what we have always called beauty to shy away from the topic any longer.

            Let me start with what Beauty is not.

Beauty is not WHO YOU ARE WITH: It seems like everywhere I go I see these girls hanging for dear life on some guy’s arm as if letting go would shatter everything they want to be. Sure he may have tons of money and look like you ripped him out of an Abercrombie catalog but if he is the kind of guy that always wants you with him it is probably because he is insecure and wants to be seen with you. You are being used.

You don’t get more beautiful by being with that guy, you just become a trophy.

Trophies collect dust and never are admired for anything but for who “won them.” You are far too beautiful to sit on somebody else's shelf. You were not created to collect dust because Woman was the only thing in all of creation that was not made out of dust. Eve came from a living, breathing, body- everything else came from the ground.

Beauty is not YOUNG: This country is full of weight loss programs and cosmetic surgeries that take the aged and transform them into youthful “beauties.” Men have told you your whole life that your value is in your appearance and since you are aging out of your good appearance your only option seems to be dressing like a teenager and hating what you see in the mirror more and more every day. Don’t believe our lies.

Grow old and be happy. Laugh away those wrinkles and know that you have more wisdom and experience than any of those girls you are trying to imitate. You don’t prove anything by looking half your age or showing that you “still got it” except that you are terribly afraid of death and don’t believe that the other side of eternity has anything to offer you.

Beauty is not OLD: Nothing ticks me off more than a little girl who hates that she isn’t ten years older. Life moves so quickly Time doesn’t need your help in blowing away your childhood. Your beauty is not in how old you look. The “you” in twenty years would trade places with you without hesitation.

Beauty is not NAKED: Since the first day Adam looked at Eve and thought to himself “Whoa man” (where we get the term “woman”), us guys have been on a continual pursuit of convincing the female race that their beauty lies in their nakedness. We tell you that you aren’t worth anything when you are fully dressed. This is because we have come under the grave misconception that woman are just objects to point our raging sex hormones at and use for our pleasure. We could not be more wrong.

            You are more than a sex toy. You don’t get more beautiful by exposing more skin. Fitting into those jeans doesn’t make you more valuable. Don’t sink to our level by attracting that kind of attention. The kind of guy you get when you use that bait deserves to be thrown back into the water. You have been bought with a price by the Creator of the universe so don’t dress like you are still for sale.

So now that I have covered what Beauty is not, I think it is time I clarify what Beauty actually is.

Beauty is about WHO YOU ARE WITH: You read that right, it looks like I just contradicted myself but let me clarify. Beauty is not about the people you associate with but by the God with whom you are surrounded. Your beauty comes from outside of you. You are a reflection of the glory of God which is a beauty far more powerful than any physical appearance or hairstyle. Beauty in the truest sense of the word is the radiance of the Holy of Holies which can saturate everything about you. People don’t even have to see you to be attracted to the beauty coming from you when you are with God.

Let the world see past your body and see into new depths of beauty. Some wise person once said that a woman should be so deep in God that any man has to find Him before they find her. Do that.

Make us guys go through intense discipleship before we even think about pursuing you. Make it impossible for someone to see you and not see God.

Beauty is YOUNG: Everybody stopped pretending life is easy a long time ago. Growing up and living life is bound to beat you up and give you scars and calluses. Try as hard as you want but you will never be able to erase them on your own but there is a God who can and wants to wipe you clean, give you a fresh start and make you beautiful again.

Beauty is the renewed youth of someone who has gone through Hell but bears no burn marks on their body and can laugh at that thing they call “past.” It doesn’t matter where they have been because they are made young again by the grace and awesomeness of God.

Beauty is OLD: People seem to have this idea that beauty is somehow trend related. In the Roaring Twenties beauty meant looking like a boy. In the sixties beauty meant dressing like the first lady. In the eighties beauty meant having hair that floated three feet off your head and used enough hair spray to put a whole in the Ozone layer.

Beauty is not a trend that dies. True beauty is as ancient and eternal as the angels in heaven. When you realize what true beauty means you are connecting yourself with the things of heaven which will be around long after your clothes go out of style. The beauty that is in you is older than humanity and still kicking.

Beauty is NAKED: We live in a day and age where enough make-up and fashionable clothing can cover up any amount of “ugliness” people think they have. True beauty, however, is naked, raw and transparent. Beauty doesn’t need to cover anything up because it has nothing to hide. Adam and Eve were naked until they discovered shame.

You don’t need to get any part of your body “done” because you let God do all your transforming.

True beauty is honest with itself and isn’t pretending to be anything it’s not. Beauty is not an act.

                Please forgive us guys for confusing you, we don’t know any better.

                        With deepest sincerity,

                                    Remorse and  

                                                Apology,

                                                            A guy