Good Mourning
Lately life has been giving me an atomic wedgie. I feel like I’ve been beaten down to a point where it is hard to get back up again before I am thrown back into the locker of depression. I don’t know how many more swirlies I can take, metaphorically speaking.
The worst part is that none of it is because I turned away from God or what He wanted. It is because I am going after bigger things that the world caved in on top of me.
I woke up this morning and frankly wanted to just stay in bed because being awake means being aware and that was not what I was looking for. As I was trying to convince myself that I really was asleep, a thought popped into my head.
Have you had a good mourning?
That wasn’t a typo, I’m not asking if the couple hours you have been awake have been pleasant but if you have had a good mourning.
As if any mourning could be good.
Webster defines mourning as “An expression of grief, the black clothing worn by a mourner,” but we know it is more than that. People as a whole have felt an obsession with digging themselves deeper into our emotional pits.
In the Bible, any time something bad happened the people affected would rip their clothes and pour ashes on their head (as to whose ashes I’ll never know). I am quite sure that Velcro was invented because of this practice since it is far more convenient than ripping your best tunic in half every time your son got leprosy or your fields caught on fire.
The point though, is that when they mourned, they wanted everyone else to know about it.
Victorian England was infamous for its’ strict mourning rituals. Books were written that described the exact period of time it was appropriate to mourn the death of a husband, brother, friend, or even 3rd cousin (twice removed). Queen Victoria stayed in mourning for her husband until her death, 40 years later! They had to wear special clothes and do special things so that the world would know they were grumpy.
So, have I had a good mourning?
I determined that I had. So far I have succeeded in making myself more and more miserable, which is the purpose of mourning right? Why do we do this to ourselves? Do we really think that it is the easier option than just getting up?
I’ve decided to quit. I am giving up on this mourning thing. I am picking out my wedgie and moving forward.
Sure I am confused, I’m hurt, and I don’t know where I am going anymore but I am choosing to let go of it and start living again.
I have said it before and I will say it again. Don’t live like there is no tomorrow, live because there is a tomorrow.
Living like there is no tomorrow is disappointing, exhausting, and temporary.
As Christians we are promised tomorrow, not necessarily on Earth but tomorrow nonetheless. It may not be tomorrow as in the next 24 hour period of time but it will come.
Jesus told His disciples in John 16
“I tell you the truth, you will weep and mourn while the world rejoices. You will grieve, but your grief will turn to joy. A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world. So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy.”
That means that all these things that are happening to me just confirm that I am finally on the right track.
That is why I am giving up on mourning, and looking forward to The Morning. That’s when the joy comes.
Give up mourning, not life.
Good Morning
